Many of us are living in a state of perpetual trauma, which makes healing so much harder.
And if you aren’t living in a state of trauma, it’s very likely someone close to you is.
The events of the last week, two mass shootings, are devastating. The lives lost; their futures stolen. The utter devastation for the victims’ family members whose lives were brutally taken from them is so deeply tragic. The families now left to deal with the loss and the ruin left behind. It’s unthinkable.
And yet, I can’t help but think how these events are a retraumatization for our whole country.
As my heart aches for the family members whose lives have been forever changed, I ache for them. I am also aching for those of us who feel the weight of these tragedies. I ache, because as a collective whole, we are suffering. We are suffering because of loss, because of loneliness, because of our fears and anxieties. We are collectively grieving how our lives have changed, how our futures have been altered. We are grieving…and, although it is not okay that we are collectively grieving so much, it’s also…okay to grieve. We are allowed to sit in our grief, our worry, our hopelessness, our individual and collective traumas.
And yet, after we give ourselves the time we need-however long that is-I hope that we can look up from our grief. If we have to, I hope we can search and find the bits and pieces and shreds of evidence of the light. This is not about looking on the bright side, or finding the hidden meaning, or searching for the silver lining. I am not talking about looking to the motivational memes on social media to give ourselves a pep talk or to get through the moment or the day. If those things work for you, great. But too often, that sort of positivity is actually damaging to our psyche because it doesn’t allow us to be truthful to ourselves about what we are dealing with in our pain, in our trauma, in our depression, in our anxiety.
As we sit in a state of stunned disbelief, fear or grief…as we sit in our trauma… it’s important that we process it in a healthy way. It doesn’t do us any good to stuff it and move on. It’s not healthy to tell ourselves “it’s fine…everything’s fine” when it isn’t. And, it’s also not helpful to get so deep in our pain, that it stops us in our tracks, keeping us from our daily routines or moving forward with our own goals.
To help you get started on a path of tackling all the feels, check out my freebie: “Three Strategies to Tackle the Trauma”.
This (relatively easy) Three-Step Guide will help you navigate the trauma and give voice to the emotions that you are feeling. You will learn specific and effective strategies to begin your healing. Research reveals that if we stuff our feelings, fears, anxieties, it can have serious implications to our health and well-being over the span of time. The more it builds up, the higher potential for more serious health issues. This freebie will also help you create a mindset that will help you build resilience which can have positive implications in the outcomes you want in your life.
Click below to download the free pdf. “Three Strategies to Start Healing”
We are living in unprecedented times. Research, data and history reveal that we now are living longer, healthier and safer than ever before (despite what it feels like). And we are living freer, wealthier and have more peaceful lives than any other time in recorded history (again, despite what it feels like). And this is not just true for those of us in the West, nor is it only true for those who are white. It is for all people, all around the world.
And yet, there is much suffering. There is much violence, so much pain and turmoil. We humans are still in despair, still depressed, anxious, unhappy and unfulfilled. So many of us are on paths of such pain. And so many more are on paths of pain but tuck it away and pretend it doesn’t exist.
There is a strange duality to our life in this era: We are living “the best life” and we are collectively and individually deeply hurting. Both of these truths can be true at the same time.
And yet, we can combat those feelings. We can even combat our circumstances. We may not be able to change our circumstances overnight, but we can make small, 1% changes in both our mindset and our actions that, over time, can lead to significant transformation. Yes, even in a pandemic. And even as so many things feel like a total dumpster fire.
We may feel powerless to change the world, but we can do small things to change our world and the worlds of those around us.
What do you think? I would love to hear your thoughts.
You can reply to this blog at firstname.lastname@example.org, or DM me on social media https://www.instagram.com/amykvaughnstudio/ or https://www.facebook.com/amykvaughncoaching.
If you find that you need more support than this resource offers, please reach out. In my coaching practice, I offer meaningful support as I walk with my clients through their hardest challenges. I work with my clients to make small, but vital mind shifts that have a profound impact on their lives. I help people build on those mind shifts so that they are increasingly capable to make more enriching choices in their lives, which leads to outcomes that they want for their lives.
I love helping people connect and create more of the life they want and then make small, meaningful changes from the inside out. That is what I am really passionate about and honestly, it’s what I am really good at, too.
Keep an eye out for information about my upcoming Workshop and new coaching groups that are in addition to the 1:1 coaching that I am doing. I’m looking forward to getting to know you more.
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or call: 1-800-273-8255
For more information about me and what I do, you can go to my website here: